Maternity leave during war. How motherhood has changed in Ukraine

However, according to data from the UN, those who had very young children were more likely to stay in Ukraine. This phenomenon is quite easy to explain — without family support, starting life from scratch in a foreign country with children of preschool age is extremely difficult.

Socportal talked to women who were going through the beginning of motherhood during the war. One of them gave birth during the shelling of Kyiv, the second returned to work when the child was a few weeks old, and the third decided to move from the capital to Mykolaiv near the front, where her husband is serving.

• Lidia (name changed), 37, a teacher from Kyiv, became pregnant with her second child at the beginning of the invasion

It was unexpected. We were planning a second child, but not at this time. I got pregnant in May 2022 and was very confused. Both because of the war and because my husband lost his job, so I was the only one working. We hesitated for a long time, but in the end we decided. My daughter was born in January 2023, when there were power outages. But I can't say that it was the most difficult.

It was difficult that I had to go back to work a month after the birth of the child.

When I was on maternity leave with my eldest son, it seemed to me that it was simply impossible for a woman to return to work so quickly. But there were no other options. I had the opportunity to come home once for a few hours, because the school is not far away, and feed. Her husband and mother-in-law took care of the child. It helped that my daughter sleeps more or less at night and I have the strength to work in the morning. The husband says that he never thought that he would perform such a role. He once saw a program on TV about men in Europe who are on maternity leave, and I was just amazed. But life forced — due to the war, his former employer closed the company and he currently has only occasional part-time work. Now, when the child is more than one and a half years old, we plan to send him to kindergarten. But it is difficult to predict whether it will not be even more difficult, whether it will not start to get sick, and what will happen during the anxiety. The kindergarten is quite old. It formally has a bomb shelter, but in fact, it is a converted cellar at the expense of the parents themselves, where they used to store vegetables and other food for the dining room. I can't imagine how all the children can fit in there. If it is impossible to use the kindergarten, the daughter will continue to stay at home with her grandmother and her husband.

• Iulia (name changed) from Kyiv, 35 years old, was an entrepreneur before her second pregnancy, gave birth to her youngest son in the summer of 2022

When the war started, I was already in the late stages of pregnancy. My husband, son, and I were in western Ukraine for a month, and then we returned to Kyiv. At that time, we invested all our savings in the purchase of two used cars from abroad, which were to be repaired in Kharkiv (a large city on the border with Russia, which is still constantly under fire). In April 2022, we dared to go and pick them up. The craftsmen agreed to take the cars a little closer to the other region. There was a big checkpoint, and on the way back we were stopped, the documents on the cars were checked, and it turned out that one of the cars had a different color. At that moment, due to stress, I did not even think about it and, of course, did not check. The police let us through only because they saw that I was pregnant.

On the day I gave birth, there was a large shelling of Kyiv. All the women in labor with their children were taken out into the corridor, and the windows in the delivery room were shaking.

In the winter of 2023, it was very difficult without light. We live in a new building, hot water, heating, stove — everything is tied to electricity. We wiped ourselves and the children with wet napkins, kept the mixture in a thermos for the youngest, and carried the stroller up the stairs. This summer, during the blackouts, it was easier, because the youngest son is already walking, he likes to climb the stairs, and the 15th floor is for him — not a problem. In everything else, of course, it is difficult. My son has to go to kindergarten in the fall. The manager assured me that they have enough bomb shelters for everyone, everything is equipped there, and there are even cots for sleeping. And to be honest, I can't wait for it. Now sometimes I replace my husband, make purchases, and deliver products by car to the chain of cafes where he works. These few hours, which I can spend alone and without family responsibilities, give me back my strength.

• Diana (name changed), is 35 years old, pregnant with her first child, and wife of a soldier. She worked as a video game developer, and after the mobilization of her husband, she went to the enterprise for the production of drones. Currently, she has moved from Kyiv to Mykolaiv, where her husband is serving.

I moved because there was finally an opportunity to be together. We didn't live as a family for two years, he rarely went on vacation, only for a few days once every 3-4 months. And even if we forget about our feelings, about the fact that we terribly miss and need each other, we should remember that now we will have a child. They grow so fast. What's the point of seeing all this just on a video call? What is the point of missing such an important period of the first year, during which emotional attachment to both mom and dad is formed?

It is not fair that the normal life was taken of two adults, and a child will be mutilated as well. So we decided to use this possibility.

Is it for long? Not clear. Everything is unpredictable, as in any military family. At the moment, I am preparing for childbirth. In Kyiv, everything was great at the women's consultation, by electronic queue or referral, without unnecessary expenses. In Mykolaiv, this is much more difficult. For one of the ordinary tests, I had to make a photocopy of the referral for 50 hryvnias. But these are all trifles compared to the opportunity to be with my husband at this moment.

What can make motherhood in Ukraine easier?

Our heroines are the few who dared motherhood during the war — the birth rate in Ukraine has predictably dropped sharply in recent years. In addition to direct security threats, the general unpredictability of the situation, the risks of separation from a husband, and the difficult economic situation also play a role in this. Sotsportal asked the expert to tell what, in addition to ending the war, could help mothers feel more supported.

• Oksana Dutchak, PhD, sociologist. Researches women's work and the field of care, is a co-author of the study on kindergartens "Who cares".

A woman needs to know that when she gives birth to a child, she will be able to return to education or the labor market after a certain period. We are primarily talking about good, high-quality, affordable kindergartens. The availability of medical care is also important, as well as certain social guarantees and labor rights. For example, about the fact that a woman will be able to return to her previous workplace. The material side is also important. Let me remind you that we currently do not have paid care leave at all (paid, if a woman works officially, is only maternity leave for 126 days).

But direct payments have less impact on the birth rate than the existence of a predictable, high-quality, accessible infrastructure where a child can be accepted at a certain age.

It is mostly three years for us now. This is too much. A shorter period of maternity leave reduces both career losses for a woman and, in general, material losses for the family when one person is forced not to work for a long time.

After the end of the war, we will have a very dramatic demographic situation, both due to the drop in the birth rate and due to migration. However, I do not think that radical steps by the state, for example, regarding the prohibition of abortion, are possible. The fact that such initiatives never even reached a vote indicates a lack of public support for them. But if the goal is really to improve the situation with the birth rate, then it is necessary to focus on the available care, education, and medical infrastructure.